Impacting youth

I ended up going into the office today to attend the power lunch mentor training. It was good to hear more about what the power lunch program is about and who the mentors and facilitators work with however, while I was sitting in and listening to the presentation, a few things kept running through my mind, which were, 1. There are a lot of things that I have never had to go through that some of the students that are worked with may have or are going through, 2. The power lunch program is doing great things in the schools that they work in, 3. God wants to work through those that are working with the students and are mentors and role models to them, 4. There are things to be learned from everyone that we come into contact with, and 5. God has a plan and will allow things to work out according to His plan and may turn our expectations and plans away.

1. While listening to the presentation, I quickly realized that I am not in tune with the “younger generations” music, culture, etc. There are a lot of things that I am not aware of and quiet frankly, I am just blinded to things going on since it’s different than who I am or what I am used to and may never have had to deal with thins where I grew up.  I grew up in a small town, was involved with extra-curriculum activities, and had parents that were there for me. The students that we are working with in the power lunch program may not have the same experiences and opportunities that I have had. And that leaves me wondering how much of an influence will I be able to have on the students if I work with them since we are from different backgrounds and experiences?

2. The power lunch program is touching many students and having an impact in many students’ lives. Through the program, they are able to have someone that they can look up to. The program is meant to help reduce truancy rates, disciplinary issues, etc.

3. God is building up people that have a passion and want to impact the student’s lives. There are 3 organizations working in the schools and they are in need of mentors that can be looked up to so that the ratio can be more like 1 mentor to every 4 or 5 students rather than it being 1 facilitator to 20-30 students. This is hard to do since there are so many students and only one facilitator but if there are more mentors then we will be able to impact more lives of students and truly listen to them one-on-one rather than becoming overwhelmed and swamped with 20-30 students. It becomes more meaningful if the ratios are smaller since then you can build true and meaningful relationships with the students and build trust with them as well.

4. Sometimes I feel like adults can think that younger people don’t know much and that we can’t learn anything form them however, that is not the case. People are experts of their own lives and know what it is that they are dealing with and going through. We can’t know what someone is going through or dealing with unless we are taking the time to listen to them, build authentic relationships with them, and walk along side them. We need to truly listen and be attentive and take the opportunities to learn from the students and from everyone we are around. It can sometimes be surprising what is learned when we just listen and go into things acting like we don’t know everything, since we don’t know everything.

5. Things may not turn out as expected but God has a plan. So, we had planned on 20 people attending the training today and we ended up with 7 people (5 that are already working with DLF or the 3 organizations that work on power lunches and 2 people that have not done the power lunch program before but interested in becoming mentors.) So, God changed our plan but brought 2 people that seem to be dedicated and very interested in the program and mentoring / impacting the lives of the students that are worked with in the schools through the power lunch program.

So, that was today and a little about the power lunch program and what’s going on with the youth leadership movement. If you want more information then go to the DLF website (one of the links on the right  sidebar) or message me if you want to know more about what I am or will be doing.

Upgrade ready...

I have been wondering and thinking about what I should blog about since I didn’t write yesterday. Things at work have been different and right now I don’t feel like there has been much to talk about in regards to what I am doing but I promise that will come eventually as I get more involved with things and things start to pick up. But in the mean time, what has God been showing and revealing to me? That’s what I want to focus on for this blog post.

I titled this as upgrade ready for a few reasons. I have recently had to have my work laptop upgraded and worked on. I needed to be able to get to some documents that I was not previously able to get to on the computer so most of today, my computer was being upgraded. I also had a notice on my phone saying that it had some software updates and needed to be upgraded as well. So, you may be asking, why are you talking about a computer and a phone? And that’s a reasonable response to this post right now.

However, with the upgrades being done it makes me think about how God sees us and what He’s doing in our lives… In my life.  I have been in Texas for a little over a month now and it makes me wonder, what is God doing and what does He have planned for me. There are times at work where I am left wondering why it is that God brought me here, with this organization, and with the people I work with. (Let me stop right there, I absolutely enjoy the people I work with and the organization that I am partnering with even in the times that I am frustrated and not understanding why things are happening so I just wanted to make that clear. I honestly don’t think that I would trade where I am at, who I am working with, and the organization I am partnering with…)

So, back to the “upgrades”, you see, just like a phone and a computer needs to be upgraded and changed, so to does our lives. We have to continue maturing in Christ and changing who we are. God leads us into different seasons of our lives and there will be times that we need to change our mindsets and just let God take over. Just like we are in charge of upgrading our electronics, so to is God in charge of upgrading His people. God will give us the things we need in order to do what He calls us to do however, it may take time, just like upgrading our electronics take time.

After an electronic is upgraded, it needs to be turned off and restarted. Sometimes I think that we need to be turned off and restarted as well. We need to have our thinking, our mind set, our expectations, our plans, and so forth turned off and restated to line up with what God has for us. We need to take a break and step back and truly see what God is trying to teach us in the midst of things rather than be non-stop and busy all the time. Just as we might sometimes think that our electronics are good to go since they have been upgraded, there will always be a new upgrade to com. Same is true with our Christian walk, we may think that we are good to go to later find out that God is calling us to something else or is wanting to lead us somewhere else. We may end up finding out that our thinking is wrong, our motives are wrong, our plans and expectations are wrong after getting on track with God’s plan. However, things can change in a second and we may find ourselves having to upgrade and realign with God.

I feel like that’s how things have been for me since I have been in Texas. I came in with specific expectations and perceptions and since I have been here, I have had to rely on God every day and try to see what it is that He is doing and why He brought me here. I am having to upgrade my expectations and perceptions to align with what God’s intentions are. I am being reminded that I am needing to be turned off, my expectations, my perceptions, etc are needing to be turned off and be restarted since they were not originally right. Now, I am needing to try to figure out what God has for me, why I am here, etc and upgrade to His level of things rather than be a step behind and in the old phase of this journey.

Sometimes, it’s irritating and takes time to make the needed upgrades and it’s not always an easy task. The same is true with our lives. It may not be an easy adjustment to follow God’s plan and guidance and it may be irritating since things don’t go the way we expect or as fast as we hoped for. But with each new upgrade, the closer we get to Christ and the more we get in line with who He has made us. It may not be fun, easy, fast, or simple but it is important to have the upgrades done and to be in dialogue and contact with God’s plan and why the upgrades are needed.

So, what is God needing to upgrade in your life? Is there apart of you that needs to be turned off and restated as new? How do you see your life like our technology and all the upgrades and old software? 

Change in seasons

Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed. Simon and his companions went to look for him, and when they found him, they exclaimed: “Everyone is looking for you!” Jesus replied, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come.” (Mark 1:35-38)

The above scripture is how we started the youth leadership movement meeting today. Every week we start by having a devotion as well as praying. This week has probably been one of the hardest weeks that I have had since being in Texas. I have found myself homesick and longing for something more. However, don’t get me wrong, I love the organization I am working with and those that I work with but I sense something missing.

Being homesick doesn’t necessarily mean that you are missing your home but it’s a feeling of “missing what's normal, what is routine, the larger sense of social space, because those are the things that help us survive.” With the way that I have been feeling lately I was reminded of things today through this scripture. I was reminded that I am longing for a deeper relationship with Christ. I don’t have a Church family in Texas right now even though there is one church that I attend weekly. I am still in search of the church that I will be able to connect with and grow in Christ with. I was also reminded that I need to be spending more time with Christ. This is one of my learning goals to get back into having a quiet time or devotional each day but it’s easy to get caught up in what’s going on and not take time to have a devotion.

I have also found myself wondering why it is that I am here. When things are slow and when I don’t quiet understand, I wonder why God brought me here of all places. Why did my plans not work out? Why did I have to leave everything behind and get away? This scripture says that Jesus left where everyone knew him. The people were looking for Him but he didn’t want to deal with them. He wanted to go to another place to preach to word of Christ. I feel like I am in that point of my life right now. I could have remained in Indiana and did ministry, I could have looked more into InterVarsity, but God has other plans for me. He called me to leave behind what I knew for something that I didn’t know. He called me to leave my family to come to Texas where I would get to know a new “family”. He called me to leave my churches back in Indiana to come speak with other churches. Yeah, this wasn’t my plan but it is God’s plan.

I am needing to take more time to connect with Christ in order to truly see where He is leading me and what it is that He is wanting me to do. He will be able to answer my questions but it takes a relationship first and listening (as well as patience, which I am not good at) to get those answers. As we talked about in the devotion today, God may be calling us away from the thing that we are doing in this point in our lives and asking or trying to get us to do something else. We need to transition and follow God’s prompting. That’s what I have had to do with coming to Texas, partnering with the General Board of Global Ministries, and working at the Dallas Leadership Foundation. God called me out of the season of my life that I had in Indiana and called me into a new season. That’s scary but I am thankful that I have some amazing people to walk through this season of life with and learn from and work with.

The last part of that scripture says “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come.”  But here is the thing to think about. Take that part of scripture and say this to yourself… “Let us go somewhere else-to ___________-so I can ____________ there also. That is why I have come” Complete the above phrase and put something in those blanks… What is it for you that need to be in those blanks? For me, I would have to say, “Let us go somewhere else-to Texas-so I can serve Christ and others there also” However, there are other things that I could put in the blank as well, that is just the more apparent response. God is trying to get each of us to do something, to enter into a new season of our lives, etc we just need to take the time to listen to Him and follow His guidance. Entering into new seasons of our lives is not easy but with God, things will work out even if we don’t have all the answers and don’t know where things will take us. Start that relationship with God now and start talking to Him about what it is that He has for your life and what belongs in the above blanks.

The seasons have changed, it is now fall so won't you let the season of your life change as well and listen to what God has for you? 

God's in control even when we can't see it

The words from this week’s Church services keep echoing in my mind. Things are not always easy yet God has it all under control. When life turns into a battle and you don’t know where to turn, turn to God since He’s got it all under control. I feel like I am constantly in a battle of mind and spirit and not seeing how God’s going to provide. Too often I allow the enemy to tell me lies yet over and over again, I am reminded of God’s provision for my life and His control over it all. God’s full of surprises and He’s in control. Time is not in our control and quiet frankly, our lives are out of our control. But, God’s in control and knows the outcome.

I often ask how it is that I got to be where I am right now, being a missionary when this was not my original plan. I had planned on being a teacher yet God’s plan for my life was different. I look back and see the trials that I have had to face and see God’s hand in it all even if the complete picture is not clear to me. God has been in control all along and He loves giving surprises. Think back on your life, is what you are doing what you thought you would be doing? Are you living where you figured you would be living? Did things go according to your plan or have they changed over time? Yeah, for me, I have to say that nothing has gone as planned, or at least not my plan.

I ended up graduating with a major in Spanish and I wanted to be able to use that Spanish in some way, so God placed me in Texas yet since I have been here, I have been hesitant and unconfident in using Spanish. Today I went to help translate for a Hispanic family yet they had a son that was able to do the translation. I am not sure what God’s plan is for me yet I have to keep reminding myself that He’s in control. I also have to remind myself of last weeks all staff meeting scripture that God wants to give us rest since right now my mind is all over the place. And most of it is things that I can only do so much and then trust God with the outcome. Yet, I am human and it’s hard to let things go when I know I am meant to meet specific expectations. So, my Spanish is not going as I had planned and hoped yet, God’s in control.

Another factor is that support raising is not going as planned. It seems that anybody I ask comes back with the response that they can’t financially support me and organizations that I ask come back and say that they can’t support me either. This has left me wondering if I will ever be able to continue with full time ministry after this 2-year experience. If I can’t even raise a minimal amount right now then how would I ever be able to raise full support? Yet, as I have stated I am reminded of the message I got from 2 services and that is that God’s full of surprises and He’s in control.

It’s not by chance or ironic that yesterday when I was leaving church the song that came on the radio was “God is in control” a song by Twila Paris which is an older song and one that I have not heard for awhile. So, between yesterday and today I have been having to reminded that God is in control even if I can’t see the outcome. It’s hard to keep moving forward sometimes but I have to trust that God will provide the financial support that I am meant to raise, that my Spanish will improve where I feel confident in speaking it, that I will gain an understanding of things that I don’t understand, etc. God’s in control but it’s not always easy to see and go each day not knowing the outcome of things or know how things will be provided. God’s in control and I need to rest in Christ in this time of life when I don’t have answers and don’t know how I will be funded or when my Spanish will come back and be comfortable speaking it again.

So, that’s my life right now and any prayer and support would be appreciated.

I've got you!

The title of this blog post came about from the all staff meeting that we had this morning. We started with reading Psalm 127:1-2 and I think we were all tired but the end of this scripture says “he granted sleep to those He loves.” For me, this scripture struck me this morning since I will be honest and say that I am tired and have been finding myself not sleeping at night. However, God doesn’t want us to be that way, He wants to fill us up and replenish us. He wants to give us rest and allow us to sleep. God doesn’t want us to be worrying about everything that we have to do or didn’t do, but He wants us to be in the here and now since we can only live in the present. “We can’t live in the past, we can’t live in the future, we can only live in the present.” And that is very true.

I found myself being a little home sick today and missing everyone back home in Indiana and all of my sorority sisters and InterVarsity (some of the most influential things during my college career) and now I find myself waking up every morning as a “missionary” with the Dallas Leadership Foundation. Now, I still have not wrapped my mind around that completely but I know God has had a plan in every step that I have made and brought me here for a reason. I also want to say that I am very blessed to be working with some amazing people who I am sure will become like family to me over the next 2 years. I went from being intimidated by the president the first time I talked to him on the phone, to being able to have a conversation with him without being intimidated. I went from not knowing anyone at the Dallas Leadership Foundation, to knowing the majority of the staff and having conversations with them as well. My placement site is already becoming like home to me but that still doesn’t take away the fact that I am 20 hours away from my biological family and home.

So, going back to the title of this blog. “I’ve got you” I can imagine that God has been saying this a lot to me lately as I have been transitioning from being in Indiana and around things that I knew to living in Texas and knowing just about nothing. I am starting to feel like I have a purpose here after being here for a month and even when I may question why I am here or if I made the right choice, I know that God’s telling me, “I’ve got you” and that He means it. He is my guide and this path is one that He knows better than I do. He has been with me from the day I was born and He will continue to guide me and have my back. He wants me to find rest physically, emotionally, and spiritually. He doesn’t want me to be worrying about the things that I can’t control and He is asking to take care of the things that may be bothering me so that I may find rest.

So, do you trust that God’s telling you today that He has you and that He wants to give you rest? What does God want to take from you so that you may find that rest in Him as well as physically?

Today I was asked to be a volunteer coordinator for an upcoming event called the Big Splash Gala and I have never done this type of stuff before. It would be easy for me to worry about all of the logistics but after today's devotion from the staff meeting, I will remind myself that God has me and He has my back. He's already worked out all of the logistics and He knows the outcome. God's got me and He has my back, what more could I ask for at this moment? Nothing, so I won't worry or stress over what I was asked to do but instead, I will rely on God and trust that He has me and He has my back!

For me, this is what God has been speaking to me today thanks to the all staff meeting and it was a reminder that I needed since I needed to be reminded to look to God and that he has my back. He knows the outcome and He has it all figured out already so I need to stop worrying (as hard as that is for me) and allow Him to do His work. Rest is important and I do believe in what this passage says! So, take rest in God and allow Him to deal with yesterday, tomorrow, and today!

I am not used to this...

This week has gone by fast so far, considering that it’s Thursday, but it has also been a long week at the same time. I have found myself on the go all week and at times I feel like I have been non-stop however, there are times that I also have nothing to do and am bored in between the non-stop and on the go. I have worked anywhere from 6-14 hours / day this week and tonight was another one of those long night. Tonight was a mix and mingle for us to try to get people in to hear about the power lunch program that the Dallas Leadership Foundation has (and I will be helping with once the program starts up in the schools and have already been attending the staff meetings for). But we wanted people to come and hear about this program since we are in need of mentors to help out since there is not enough man / woman power to do it all on our own. It went okay however; today was just a day that I was not used to.

Being in a different area, atmosphere, etc than I am used to can have some challenges. The Texas heat is one of those areas that I have to get used to and I found myself not feeling the best right before the mix and mingle. One of my supervisors and the other’s that help with the youth leadership movement found out about it and were worried about me. I feel like I was constantly being asked if I was going okay, how I was feeling, if I had eaten, etc and my response kept being “I am fine” since I am stubborn and that’s always my response. However, that didn’t stop them. We ended the mix and mingle time and I was waiting around to help clean up but when my supervisor saw me he didn’t think I was doing well and was worried. To make the story short, I was told to leave and not help clean up (however, if you know me then you would know that I am the type that is there till the end, gets the job done, and will stay till everything is finished) so, I waited around a little bit longer until they finally told me again to leave and I gave in and left.

I was also told that I was getting some things done too fast since I was running out of things to do. I was helping input some data into our computer system (much like I did in college with InterVarsity in regards to keeping track of attendance, following up with people, etc) so this is nothing new (however the program that we use is) but once you know what you are doing then it’s fairly easy, just takes a little bit of time. So, I got done with inputting all the data that was needed to be put in and then was told that I was going too fast (not in a bad way, just surprised that it was done…

So, here are a few take away from today that I am not used to

1. I am not used to leaving before the job is done
2. I am not used to being constantly worried about by my supervisors/boss
3. I am not used to being told that I am working too fast
4. I am still adjusting to the Texas heat
5. I am still as stubborn as I have always been
6. I am still determined to get the job done

What's the possitive?

Yesterday I was asked to help my placement site in communicating with a Hispanic family so, today, I took on that challenge and called the family to see if we could video and interview them on how they liked the work that was done on their house. However, at the end of the conversation, they ended up saying that they did not want to be video taped. Being who I am and owning the task that I was given, I was instantly hard on myself since I felt like I had failed however, I know that the enemy would love for me to say this to myself. I graduated with a major in Spanish, took Spanish for 8 years, and studied abroad in Costa Rica for 5 weeks. Now, I am not sure why the family had denied the request to be video taped since it could be due to them not knowing who I am, my Spanish may not have been the most fluent and smooth, they may not have understood the reason for the video, or many other reasons that may have led them to say that they didn’t want to be video taped.

However, after phone conversation and having the offer turned down, I am glad to say that I am partnering with an amazing organization and have brothers and sisters in Christ at my placement site. I had to attend a 4 hour-long meeting and we always start with a devotion and prayer. The devotion today was about not fearing and was prayer is always a needed and good thing! So, this all happened and even after things didn’t start out as I had hoped this morning, it was good to be able to use my Spanish some and I look forward to the days that I am able to use it even more, but hopefully next time I will be speaking to people in person rather than on the phone.

Today, I was also reminded about how things are back home in Indiana. The weather there and here are very different since Indiana’s temperature is in the 70’s and here in Texas, it’s in the 90’s. This is the time of year where you would be going to the apple orchard, starting to get pumpkins from pumpkin patches, going on hayrides, and doing things that are associated with fall weather. However, Texas is still in the 90’s and not Indiana. Fall is probably one of my favorite seasons and yet it’s not apparent here in Texas right now. I was also reminded of the fact that I probably won’t be traveling this holiday season and won’t be with the family and it’s going to be hard. I don’t think I have ever missed a holiday with my family so this will be a hard transition as the holiday seasons start to approach. Yeah, it would be awesome to be able to be home for at least Christmas, but I am not sure how that would work out.

However, in the midst of being a little home sick, missing friends and family, and dealing with the transitions, I am glad that I am working in a Christian atmosphere and I look forward to getting to learn more about the Dallas Leadership Foundation and getting more involved with the work that they do here. So, I was reminded that I need to look for the good in every situation rather than dwell on the things that weren’t meant to happen or in the difficult times. God is with me and will always be with me. God is enough and I know that He has me here in Dallas for a reason, not by a mistake.

¿Me preguntó qué?

The title of this blog is in Spanish for a reason. The English translation of it is “you asked me what?!” This has double meaning to it. Today I was asked if I could make a phone call to a Hispanic family that the Dallas Leadership Foundation helped during Celebration of Hope. Celebration of Hope is one of the big events that takes place in June (so before I arrived to Texas) but during that time, they work on houses by painting them and doing various other things to help the neighborhoods out. So, they helped this Hispanic family out and now they are wanting to interview them and video them talking about their experience with the Dallas Leadership Foundation and the work that was done on the house during Celebration of Hope. Here’s the thing though, I am really the only one that can speak and understand Spanish so that’s why I was asked to make this phone call and help out with the interview. So, my first thought to myself was “¿Me preguntó qué?” well actually in English but you get the point. I was definitely at a loss on what to say since I have not used Spanish (well spoken Spanish) for 9-10months or longer. I am not fully confident in my Spanish capabilities but I realize that this is a time where I need to rely on God and trust that He has equipped me to do this. I took Spanish for 8 years, studied abroad in Costa Rica (living with host families where I only spoke Spanish), and majored in Spanish. It will be good to be able to utilize what God has allowed me to do and my major but there is fear. I will be sure to post back how things go tomorrow.

The second meaning of this title is that I was with the president of the Dallas Leadership Foundation this evening and he ended up asking me “what have you been learning?” I tried to give a cheap answer but that didn’t work, I tried to stray the conversation away from that question, but again that didn’t work, so why the hesitation? The hesitation is because I have not really taken the time to realize what it is that I am learning so far in this experience. I have been on the job for 3 weeks now and been in Dallas for 4 weeks, so what am I learning? I wish I could answer that but at the moment, I don’t know. I am mainly learning more about who God is in me and what God has me here for than I am learning about things from the job. However, I will say one thing that I am learning from the job, and that is that the Dallas Leadership Foundation truly gets what “ministry with” is all about and they realize the importance of relationships. They are not going into the neighborhoods and telling those that live there how to do things and doing everything for them but they are there to be a support and to do ministry “with” not for them. This goes right along with what the US-2 program is all about and I look forward to learning from this organization these next 2 years and understanding a different approach to ministry and reaching out to others.

So, ¿Me preguntó qué? I am sure I will be saying that to myself a lot over these next 2 years and I hope you will follow me on this adventure and through these questions and tasks that I may have this response to.

Trust God's timing

Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. ~Psalm 37:4

This has been a verse that I have read many times and I would agree with it but I had never truly grasped what it says and have never truly put it into practice. Yeah, I went to this verse when I was deciding on what to do after graduating but in the end, that was a decision I had to pray about since both of the options I was face with was the desire of my heart. As work is starting to pick up some and as I continue to live in Texas, I have been finding myself having to cling to God more. I have also started to realize that you have to pray and ask God for the desires of your heart. Yes, God already knows all of this, but He wants us to know that and to ask Him for the desires of our heart. When we ask and when we receive then we get the chance to see God at work and know the power of prayer and the desires of God.

With going into week 3 of work, I have been frustrated with how things have gone since I like being organized and knowing what’s going to happen. However, God has allowed things to be “chaotic” in my terms of things. Now, why would God allow me to be frustrated when I am doing ministry and why wouldn’t He have things go 100% smoothly? I may not know the complete answer to that, however, I do believe that it is in part do to the fact that God has been wanting me to come to Him and seek Him above all else. In the midst of all the transition and change, I had found myself slipping from God’s presence. I had found myself trying to do things on my own, and I had sadly forgotten how I got to where I am and why I am here. This is not just ministry but it’s a time to grow closer to God.

Yesterday, God showed up and made Himself clear. I went to church with the neighbors and I will be honest and say that I didn’t connect with God there but then I went to First United Methodist Church of Richardson and it was there that God showed up and He continued to show up the rest of the night. Worship is starting to become a major part of how I connect with God and how God speaks to me and we ended up singing a song called, “In Your Presence” by Elevation Worship and it was from the words of the song that I was reminded that God is with me and has never left me. No matter how far I fall, God is there to catch me and no matter how much I try to do things on my own, God is there for me to turn to and guide me and help me with the task ahead of me.

So, I was frustrated with work and what I was going to be doing. I didn’t understand and I needed clarity so I prayed and God answered and gave me clarity. Then I was talking with my host family from Costa Rica and was telling them that I miss speaking Spanish and want to be able to use it while I am serving here in Dallas, and today God answered me. I will be helping with translating at some point possibly this week. Now, I will be honest and say that this is stretching for me since I haven’t used Spanish for about 9-10 months now but once again, I have to remind myself to ask God for the help and He will be there. You see, God’s not just going to give us everything we want without asking, we have to do the work and we have to ask and do our part in making it happen. It would be easy to give up and say God is holding back on us but trust scripture and trust God. God wants to see us succeed and He wants to help us, He wants to give us the desires of our heart and I was reminded of that today and yesterday. Now, I am sure I will still have days that I forget to look toward God for the help and I will try to do things on my own but that’s apart of human nature. We are not perfect and when I do fail, I know that God will be there to pick me back up again (and probably be shaking His head in disbelief that I would keep trying on my own) since God wants to help us, He loves us so much that He is on our side. So, why fail and do things on our own? Why keep things to ourselves rather than to go to God and ask Him for help and bring our concerns, our failures, our hopes, our desires, etc to Him? He already knows them, but He wants us to bring them to Him and lay them down at His feet. He wants us to speak up and have a conversation with Him just like we do with a friend.

So, what do you need to ask God for today? What are you trying to do on your own but keep failing at? What do you need to be talking to God about? What are the desires of your heart? When was the last time that you went to God and asked Him for something? (He may not answer in the way that we want but He will answer… He may not answer in our timing, but He will answer) so trust God, ask God, and watch God work and answer you! You will never know unless you ask, so ask and see where things will take you!

Patience, it’s an every day test

Patience is not something that comes easy for me and it never has. However, it seems like I keep running into this factor of life face to face. I am traveling down the road or ministry yet, patience keep showing up. I ran into this saying “God has a special timing; Never EARLY. Never LATE. It takes a little PATIENCE and FAITH but it's WOTH THE WAIT” and it speaks a lot of truth. If anybody knows me then they know that I like to get things done and even when I am not working at the office or on the clock, I am still working and trying to get things accomplished. However, this is not always able to happen, sometimes it takes more than just me to get things done and I have to wait on others to get me information. I might be new and have to learn the ways of the organization and those that I am working with before I can get things accomplished. I may not understand why I am where I am or where things will take me but God does.

So, you see this past week I was left on my own at the office since both of my supervisors were gone. Even though they tried to give me things to do, there were times that I was bored since I would get what they needed me to do done. I am also having to work with others in order to get things done however, once the message is sent then it’s up to those that I sent the message to, to get me the information and it’s out of my control. However, I am not patient and I want to continue messaging them and keep on them until I get the information that I need to get the job done. In both departments that I am working in, I have to work with people and I have always been the type to do the work on my own. However, after reading “Next Generation Leader” as I posted about the other day and knowing how I work, I am realizing that I need to learn patience and I am needing to truly observe myself and discover how God has wired me since I can’t do everything on my own. I have to work with others and even though I am a team player and I enjoy working with others, it frustrates me when people don’t work at the speed I want them to. This is where patience comes in. I need patience to go with the flow, I need patience to trust that God will work everything out, I need patience to trust others to get things to me by the deadline, I need patience for understanding, I need patience every day!

So, the phrase that I posted earlier, “God has a special timing; Never early. Never late. It takes a little Patience and Faith but it's worth the wait” These next 2 years are the start of an amazing journey and right now there is a lot of unknown in my future and how things are going to get done. I am not patient but I know that God is always on time and has a plan and will work everything out. Right now, I do need to be patient with my work since it off to a slow start for how I am used to things. I also need patient when it comes to support raising since it seems like I am making the ask, but I am getting nowhere and am not getting the financial support that is recommended. This is a hard place for me to be since I like to know what’s going to happen, how it’s going to happen, and where things are going to take me. These next 2 years, I have none of that.

So, how is God asking you to be more patient in your life, your work, your every day schedule, etc? I know for me, He is asking me to be patient in everything and it’s something that I am aware of. So if you could keep me in prayer, here are a few prayer requests for the moment:

• For my support raising and to broaden my network where people will join me in my mission these next 2 years and commit to supporting me and the ministry

• For patience at work, that while things may be slow right now, that I may find peace in the slow times and be thankful for those times

• For patience with those I am working with, that I may want information right away but know that others are busy and things will get done, just have to be patient and trust those I am working with and around

• For understanding when I may not know what is going on, but to be thankful for the opportunities that I have these next 2 years

• For a continued reminder that God’s under control and He controls the outcome of every day so to remember to look to Him every day and be thankful for what He has given me and wired me to do

• To discover what God has wired me to do and what my passions are

• To remember what the “Next Generation Leader” (read my last post for better understanding of the book) talked about and apply it to my life 

If you are interested in financially supporting me then click on my financial tab above. If you know of anyone that would be interested in supporting me, then please message me and we can talk! Thanks for the help!

“God has a special timing; Never EARLY. Never LATE. It takes a little PATIENCE and FAITH but it's WORTH THE WAIT"

The Next Generation Leader

While both of my supervisors are gone, I was asked by one of them to write a summary of the book "The Next Generation Leader" by Andy Stanley and while this was a little bit of a challenge since the book was 15 chapters long broken down into 5 sections, I later realized that there was some common aspects to what was being said. However, the end of the book summarized it up as best as it could be and I wanted to share what I got from the book with you guys since it's a great book and I think any leader should read it! (However, I was also a leadership studies minor so I enjoy learning about leadership especially when it goes along with my faith and God!)

Book summary:

In the epilogue, it gives the best summary of what the Next Generation Leader talks about which is, “You must discover and play to your strengths and delegate your weaknesses. You’ve got to be courageous, and you've got to be clear in the midst of uncertainty. You need to find a leadership coach. And along the way it is absolutely essential that you maintain your character.”

Section summary:

Section 1: become more mission driven rather than need driven, do what only you can do, do what you’re good at rather than just what you’re willing to do, don’t attempt to do everything, and play on your strengths.

Section 2: move forward even when fear is present, speak up rather than keep silent, take chances, see and seize opportunities, be willing to go first, trust that God’s with you, be able to say no, face current reality, and dream.

Section 3: learn to thrive in uncertain environment since uncertainty will always exist, be clear and confident, and seek counsel.

Section 4: continue learning, seek advise from those around you that have more experience than you, find someone that is willing to give you feedback on your performance and grow/learn from them.

Section 5: character is the will to do what’s right even when it’s hard, live out what you preach, trust God to control the outcomes rather than allowing the world to control the outcomes, and have the courage to do what’s right even when it’s hard

My Overall summary:

Be the leader and person that God has made you to be rather than trying to be someone that you aren’t. Build on the strengths and gifts that God has given you rather than trying to do things that you’re not wired to do. Speak up and find your voice rather than remain quiet. Allow others to show you what you may not see in yourself or the job that you are doing. Trust God with the choices made and the outcomes since uncertainty will always be present but so will God.


So, how are YOU going to live out being the next generation leader?

Going solo: Day 1

Today was the first day that both of my supervisors were gone since they are in New Orleans for a conference. While they are gone, I have been left with doing a few things however I went into work today not know what I would be doing. I then ended up receiving an email from one of my supervisors asking me to do a few things for him today but that didn’t take long and I also finished the book that he wanted me to read. So, with a big even coming up, the big splash gala, I ended up helping the public relations department with some of the silent auction things. I was able to take photos of all of the items so that they could be posted for the bidders to see. Taking photos has always been something that I enjoyed so while it took me a few hours to complete, it was something that I enjoyed doing and knew that I was accomplishing something.

Now, I have to write an overall summary of a 15 chapter (5 section) book (yeah, that’s a challenge). Tomorrow, I am not sure what will happen since my supervisors are still gone but I do have 2 tool loaning appointments to take care of and then I am not sure. Well, besides waiting on a few emails to get a schedule made up for the power lunches and helping someone else that’s in the office.  So, that was my day of going solo and I am glad that I was busy and accomplishing something. I then received a message from one of my supervisors asking if I had enough work to do to get through tomorrow (well, with the big splash gala coming up, I am sure I can find work to do to keep busy) so I will post again tomorrow and let you know how day 2 of going solo, taking care of the tool loaning program by myself, etc goes. 

YOU Feed Them!

Matthew 14: 15-21

As evening approached, the disciples came to him and said, “This is a remote place, and it’s already getting late. Send the crowds away, so they can go to the villages and buy themselves some food.”

Jesus replied, “They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat.”

“We have here only five loaves of bread and two fish,” they answered.

“Bring them here to me,” he said. And he directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then he gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people. They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces that were left over. The number of those who ate was about five thousand men, besides women and children.

Today during the 4-hour meeting that I had with the youth leadership department at work today, we opened up with the above passage where Jesus feeds the 5000. This has been a passage that I have read many times and studied a few times as well but today was a new take on it that I may have noticed before but with the work that I am doing now, it really stood out. So, first of all, we see that Jesus wants the people to be there when the disciples would rather them leave. So, how many times do we tell people to leave and for what reasons? Are we afraid of there being too many people attending a meeting or partnering with us that we would rather them leave than have to follow up with them all?

Jesus also told the disciples not to turn away the people, as I just stated but told them to feed them. The disciples must have been thinking “seriously Jesus, you want us to feed 5000 people when we have only 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish? Yeah, how is that going to happen, we can’t do that!” And the disciples would have been absolutely right with that, they couldn’t feed the 5000 people. However, they could feed the 5000 if they had the help from God to do so! How many times do we think that something is impossible and we try it on our own and fail? I know I have been guilty of that and I usually do fail or become tired. I have been trying to make this transition on my own and there have been times that I have put God aside and just went on with my day but God is wanting us to partner with Him and see what He can do.

So, the disciples had very few resources but they were on the look out for what could help them. The little boy that had the fish and bread was the one that made it possible to have food. The disciples saw him and allowed him to help them out. However, as I stated above, they couldn’t come close to feeding the 500 with the little bit of resources that they had. They were probably worried and afraid and didn’t know what to do but God did. So, they asked God to help them and He blessed them and honored their request. God was able to multiple the resources that the disciples had found to feed the 5000 people and have plenty left over. The disciples didn’t end up waiting for someone else to feed the people but they had to take action and feed them themselves, but with the help of God since this was something they were not capable of doing on their own. They needed a miracle.

So, how does this apply to my ministry and what it is that I am doing? Good question! This applies to my life right now in many ways. I have to raise some support and I have tried to do it on my own but I have few resources. I need to look to God and ask Him to bless me and multiple what I have. I also need to keep an eye open and be looking for resources since they can come at unexpected times. I need to broaden my networking and see what God will bring my way. I also need to be willing to do the work myself rather than waiting for someone else to do the work. This may be in regards to raising support, I can’t just wait for someone to say they will support me but I need to be making the request and doing the work to get people to support me. I also need to do the work at my placement site, even though meetings are not my thing and I would rather be busy, this is a necessary step in the process of the ministry and I need to do it. I need to look toward God and acknowledge Him in the work that I am doing or I won't accomplish anything. What areas of your life are your ignoring God and putting Him aside? What are you trying to do on your own but failing at doing or could improve at if you had God's support and presence? How is God asking YOU to "feed" the people and what does that look like?

So, some more questions for you as my readers, how can you apply the above passage to your life right now? What is God telling you to do rather than waiting for someone else to do it? (This could be going into ministry, it could be talking to someone, it could be to be there for someone and listen to them, it could mean being the last person at an even and broaden your network, etc) And lastly, I will make the ask, if you feel led to do so, would you consider financially supporting me and the ministry that I am apart of? If you are willing to support me in any amount, I have an advance (financial support) tab above that you can go to and learn about how you are able to financially support me or you can message me and I would be glad to help you out.

Thanks for reading and may God bless you all! 

Reality of ministry

I wasn’t going to write a blog post tonight but felt ended up feeling like it would be a good idea to write so here’s what going on. Today reality struck me. I am going onto 3 weeks of being in Texas and 2 weeks of working at my placement site. Even though I have settled into my new environment, it truly didn’t dawn on me until today when I was heading to work what it is that I am doing. I am living a missionary life and a life for God. With that comes a lot of sacrifice and commitment. One of the sacrifices that come with being in ministry is the reality that I won’t be around for the holidays. The holidays have always been a time for my family to get together but this year will be different. I will more than likely be spending the holidays in Texas rather than home in Indiana with my family and that’s honestly a hard realization to accept. My family means a lot to me and even though I am probably close to a 20-hour drive away from home, they are still always on my mind. I have been there for my niece and nephews since they were born so not being there for them now is hard.

Again, I enjoy the organization I am partnering with and the people that I work with but as the holidays to come closer, I know that it will become harder to be here in Texas. I know that it’s awhile away but prayers are appreciated as I am missing family and friends. I call home once a week and talk to friends every once in awhile but virtual communication is not the same as being there in person. I guess you never know what it is that you had until you leave it behind. God ended up calling the disciples and led them away from their homes, occupations, family, etc. Now I am able to relate to the disciples since I am in the midst of being gone and in some sense, starting a new life and journey. It’s not always easy but I know this is where God has led me and He will be my strength when I am weak and my guide when I am lost. 

Toxic Charity

I have also been reading “Toxic Charity” and that book has also gotten me to thinking and wondering some things. Volunteering and helping others has always been such an important aspect of my life but after reading what I have from this book I have to wonder if I am causing more damage than good. I have good intentions but what is the end result of my helping out and volunteering? Am I helping the people that I help gain a dependency on others rather than owning their situation and making a difference? Are they learning from what I am doing or am I taking away something from them for doing things that they could do for themselves? These are all questions that keep coming to mind as I learn more about the organization that I am partnering with and learning about the way that they do things and why they do things. Yes, right now I am attending many meetings but that’s because we want to lead behind the communities and help them come to the solutions themselves. We want the communities to work through things and we are there to support them and be there for them.

In this book, they give 6 things and call it the oath for compassionate service, which I will list below but while reading them, if you have done volunteer work/ mission trips/ etc before, then ask yourself, what was the outcome of the work you did? Is the work going to help sustain the community? Did you leave the community in a way where once you left then they would be able to provide for themselves and do what you did? Or did you go in and do all the work and leave the communities you were working in empty handed where they have to continue relying on outsiders to come in and do things for them when they are probably capable of doing the work and learning from you?

I know I have been guilty of doing this type of work and from reading the book so far, it has left me wondering how I can continue volunteering an helping out but also have a lasting effect on the communities and people I help. How can I teach the people I help what I come in and do? How can I enter into the communities and listen to them and do what they need rather than going in and telling them what needs to be done? How can I come along side the communities allow them to do what they are capable of rather than wait for others to just give them things? I pray that during my 2 years of service here at D.L.F. that I will learn from this organization and gain some insight on these questions.

The oath for compassionate service:

•        Never do for the poor what they have (or could have) the capacity to do for themselves
•         Limit one-way giving to emergency situations
•         Strive to empower the poor through employment, lending, and investing, using grants sparingly to reinforce achievements
•         Subordinate self-interests to the needs of those being served
•         Listen closely to those you seek to help, especially to what is not being said-unspoken feelings may contain essential clues to effective service
•         Above all, do no harm