Surrendering ALL

Since the New Year and especially the past few weeks, I have found myself having more questions than answers and wondering where things are taking me and what God is doing in my life and through me. Wondering if I am making any difference, if people are able to see Christ in me, if my life is being changed by those that I work with (both community members, schools, staff, etc). I have also found myself just going through the motions of “ministry” of doing things just because it’s what I am supposed to do rather than truly taking a step back and seeing the situation and task ahead of me as God sees it and fully embracing what He has for me.

I feel like everybody, including those in the ministry field, goes through times in their lives where we find ourselves just going through the motions. We get so caught up in doing what we do that we forget why we are doing and seeing God through the work that we are doing. We forget that everyday we have to lay our lives down and surrender everything to God.

I realize that there is a lot of pain, hurt, injustice, etc in Dallas where I am serving and that the organization that I am working with is trying to bring hope to Dallas and everyone that we come into contact with. Yet, how can we bring hope when we get caught up in the everyday tasks that we forget the reason we are doing the work we are doing and how hope is going to come about? There is no way that we can bring hope to people in our own flesh and in our own strength but when we remind ourselves that God is already at work and that God is present and He’s the reason for the work we are doing, and remind ourselves that God desires hope and equality for all then we will be able to start making a difference.

Ministry truly is my passion and working with those in the community that may at times feel hopeless, not know where to turn, feel like they are forgotten about, etc is not always easy yet Christ is the strength and hope that keeps us going. Without God then we would be getting absolutely nowhere. I realize that God is the only hope there is since this world is broken and Dallas is a broken place but God is very much present all around but it takes us having to take a step back and truly open our eyes to see the work that God is doing. We can’t just live day to day and go through the motions since then we would be missing out on the big picture and why God has us doing what we are doing.

Lately, I have found myself right there where I am just going through the motions and not truly embracing what God is doing and quiet frankly, I have forgotten why I am here in the first place. I got to the point where I have been forced to slow down (literally, having to slow down since I have been sick for over a month now with bronchitis and it was a relapse from about 2-3 months ago.) With having to be home from work some and resting, it has given me the chance to truly examine what’s going on.

In the midst of this all, I have found myself empty even though I attend church weekly (well, actually attend 2 churches weekly), I am getting involved with the churches, I would follow through with work, etc yet I have been empty and haven’t been able to shake the feeling that I’m missing something. Today at church, the message may not have been that’s important but the worship was and the reminder that I was called into ministry and that it will require me to surrender everything to God was a reminder that I needed. I don’t want to just live day by day going through the motions since that will leave me empty and will go against the reason God has me here in Texas.

There is so much that God is doing that He is calling me and you to surrender our lives every day and to ask God to guide us and show us what it is that He is doing. It takes us surrendering ourselves to God so that He can work through us so that we may bring hope to others who may not feel like there is much hope. It takes us surrendering our lives so that we can live for God and represent Him in a way that everyone that we come into contact with will see that God is with us and that He is the hope that they need.

Before coming to Texas, I had other dreams but God changed my route and I have to be okay with that. I looked back at some of my journal entries and realize that God has been preparing me for the work in Texas all my life and that God has perfect timing. I wanted to enter into ministry my freshman year of college and I joked around telling people that I was going to drop out but God kept me there. You see, God places instincts in us and passions in us to do His will and to allow Him to work through us. It is never our work but it is always His work. He could change the world all by himself if He truly wished to but He desires for us to partner with Him and to allow Him to work through us.

The US-2 program is about ministry “with” not “for” or “to” and I absolutely agree. We should be doing ministry with God not for God or to God and we should be working with those that we serve not for them… Allow people to do for themselves what they can rather than going in and taking over and doing things for them. Yeah, it’s not always easy work, it will be frustrating at times, it will test your patience, and so much more but in the end, you would have done more for them than you realize and you will have grown more than you would have if you just went in and did things for others.

In the US-2 program, one of the main keys is growing in mission. This is sometimes an area where I have a hard time figuring out what God is doing and how I am growing but when I take a step back and truly take a look at what’s going on, What God’s doing, why God brought me here, and focus on Him and His work (since after all, it’s all God’s work NOT ours) then I am able to see how I am growing and being “tested”. The ministry life is not always easy but it’s one I would follow all over again since in the end it’s all about what God is doing and it’s not about us.

It’s about fully surrendering to God our lives, our finances, our day-to-day activity, our relationships, our everything. It requires an everyday act of surrendering and trusting God and in the end; He will be the one that brings hope, light, and restoration to this world. Everything we do is God’s work and He has chosen to use us to carry out His work. So, what do you need to surrender to God and how are you going to start living out the ministry that God has called you to? How are you going to look at the work that God has called you to (as something that you are just doing or something that is bringing hope and life to others?)

This is the song that we ended with at church today and it was a reminder that our dreams, our lives, everything belongs to God and that we need to surrender them to Him! God is burdened by the pain that exists in this world as so should we. However, we shouldn’t just ignore the hurt, pain, etc but we should do something about it and start bringing hope to those we encounter and allow them to ultimately see God at work. So, take a step back and truly look at the communities you work in, the lives you impact, the people you come into contact with, the networking, etc and try to see it all from God’s perspective and see how He is at work and see how you can come alongside God and continue doing His work. Stop going through the motions but truly embrace what God is doing and what God has planned for you and the reason He has you where you are! 

It's not an easy task to surrender everything to God and to live as God has intended for us to live. It's not easy to be the one that people look to for hope, encouragement, etc but it's about time that we all start giving our lives to God and see what He can and wants to do through us. We can't do it on our own but with God we can!

May this song be your prayer and may you trust God, surrender all, and go out to the coomunities or where every it is that God has you and bring hope to the hopeless, broken, etc. And may God be with you every step of the way and give you His eyes to see thw communities and the world as He sees it and show you the work that He is already doing! For me, it's Dallas that God has called me to and the Dallas area that He wants to bring hope to!

I'm giving You my heart, and all that is within 

I lay it all down for the sake of You my King 

I'm giving You my dreams, I'm laying down my rights 

I'm giving up my pride for the promise of new life  

And I surrender all to You, all to You 

And I surrender all to You, all to You  

I'm singing You this song, I'm waiting at the cross 

And all the world holds dear, I count it all as loss 

For the sake of knowing You for the glory of Your name 

To know the lasting joy, even sharing in Your pain